So as you probably all know, I have left Africa. For some this may be a relief, I know for my family it is, but for others you may be confused, "why", you ask?
Well, I guess you could say I'd just had enough. Enough of living in fear, going to sleep anxious, enough of constant cultural misunderstandings and through it all I came to realise… I didn't want to live like this. Sudan is a lot different than many other parts of Africa and a lot less safe. I was unhappy and frustrated. So after much prayer and contemplation I decided to follow another dream that has been in my heart for many years. (But more about this later)
When I first felt to go to Africa I never knew for how long, or whether I would come out if it alive. I just knew I had to go. Through this experience I have learnt so… much. Much of it too hard to put into words, but I know I have grown and I see the world through different lenses now. It was defiantly an experience I wouldn't have given up for anything. I really appreciate everyone's support and encouragement so much!!!
Many questions arose in my heart during this time…especially thoughts about war and the evil of mankind.
This place, Africa, is so complex. This land is so full of blood, full of war, hatred, fear. Full of evil. Yet amidst it all, are a strong people, yearning, hoping, praying for peace. That's all they want, to be free to live a peaceful life. It's not the money there after, its not things, its not to travel. As much as they would love this – it's just to be free. Freedom is the cry of the heart!
What do you do when a country, a continent is ruled by evil forces at work through corruption, deceit, lies and murder?!
The war in Sudan has been going on since 1955! That's over 50 years. That's pretty much affected every single person in the Sudan. Young and old have seen war. Have had to flee for their lives. Have had to live in caves or in the bush like animals. Everyone has seen death, they know what death looks and smells like. Nearly everyone would have had someone close to them die. Many have lost parents; brothers; sisters. Some not killed – just taken, never to be seen again. A chapter of grief that can never be closed.
Sudan, Uganda, Rwanda, Congo, Sierra Leone, have all witnessed atrocities unimaginable. And that's only to name a few. It seems this land is defiantly cursed.
If it's not fighting, it's famine, or disease, or lack of clean water and sanitisation. Even if you survive it all, you are constantly tormented in mind by what you've witnessed or made to do.
I wonder what's going to happen. If there is hope. Will Africa ever be the breadbasket of the world again?
Africa is the richest land anywhere on the earth. Full of natural resources that makes people cRaZy. It seems the love of money, really is, the root of all evil.
There has been so much blood shed it makes one sick to think about it.
Uganda: Idi Amin comes into power… Over 300,000 dead
Sierra Leone: Civil war, perpetuated by the conflict of 'blood diamonds' where innocent victims are having their hands and feet cut off. Thousands killed
Rwanda: 1994 , genocide. Friends and neighbours turned against each other. Over 800,000 people dead in only 100 days.
Angola: 16 Year civil war . Over 300,000 people dead.
Dominion Republic of Congo: An estimated 3 million … Dead.
One of the saddest things to me though is the use of child soldiers. Children have been recruited to fight for centuries by both government and rebel groups, but I think the worst of them all would have to be the "Lords Resistance Army". The LRA is an army nearly entirely made up of children and one of the most horrific, and terrifying army's to have ever existed. South Sudan, North Uganda and the North Congo live in constant fear of the LRA.
Joseph Kony began building his army in 1987, starting out as the 'Lords Army', kidnapping troops from the UPDA.(Ugandan Army) Joseph was clearly a man possessed by demons, as noticed by the soldiers "they would take over his body, where once he couldn't even speak for 3 days". He was said to be guided by a number of "good" spirits and he had come 'to teach people to follow God'. The sick thing about Kony is that his movement started out to fight on behalf of his people, the Acholi, against the government of Uganda, yet more and more the Acholi became his victims. Civilians were attacked and abducted to serve Kony as soldiers, porters and sex slaves. Kony claimed that the Acholi should be killed for rejecting God's anointed leader (himself). "If the Acholi didn't support us, they must be finished" he is reported saying to his soldiers.
In 1991 the National Resistance Army (NRA) mounted a campain against Kony but this had unspeakable repercussions. Kony's troops were ordered to kidnap men, women, and children. They were also ordered to cut of noses, ears and hands. Others bored holes through lips and padlocked their victims mouths shut. Others were hacked to pieces with Pangas (Machetes). At about the same time, 1994, they changed their name to 'The Lords Resistance Army' (LRA) and the National Islamic Front regime in the North Sudan began to support them! (Believed to be in retaliation against Ugandan President Musieveni's support to the Southern Peoples Liberation Army.) If it was not for North Sudan's support the LRA probably would not have been able to continue!
The LRA's hideous treatment of the African people seems to fit the North Sudanese Islamists plan to destabilize the region of Africa and make it vulnerable to the spread of radical Islam. So this has meant the LRA has been able to infiltrate not only Uganda, but South Sudan and the Congo.
90% of Kony's LRA soldiers are abducted children. As many as 50,000 children have been taken since 1986. The LRA has killed more than 100,000 (mostly) civilians and almost the entire population of the Acholi in Northern Uganda were confined to Internally Displaced Persons Camps (IDP camps) where they face many other risks such as famine, disease, rape and are still not even safe from LRA infiltration.
The saddest thing though, is the children abducted. Tied up and forced to march through the bush for days. Usually forced to carry heavy supplies, in bare feet with no food or water. If a child became ill – killed. Try's to escape – killed. And it's the children who must carry out the execution. They are forced to kill. Not just a quick shooting. No, death is to be as painful as possible. Usual the child is hacked to death or beaten with sticks. Children are often forced to kill their own siblings just to ensure their loyalty to the movement. Within one week of being captured every child is required to kill another child. This helps create alienation against society in the mind of the child. Kill or be killed. Many of the boys are also traumatized when forced to rape women, during ambushes. Children are often beaten to harden them for battle, some so savagely they are disfigured for life. The girls are usually married off to the commander who has rights to her at any time and often beats the girl to retain submission. The girls, even when returning from fighting must still cook for their husband and perform any duties he may ask. She is his slave.
The LRA live in the bush and are now split up. The largest group is in the bush in Northern Congo, others are believed to be living in small groups throughout Southern Sudan, attacking when they need food or supplies. You may remember me telling you about the LRA attack 3km away from our base in March. They created such a fear in the people that at least a thousand people were seen fleeing the surrounds of Yei to camp in the middle of the town for protection.
I really feel for the people. They are tired. Tired of living in fear. Tired of running, hiding, living off leaves and berries in the bush. Tired of being hunted like animals and brutal attacks.
Africa is defiantly a place of extremes. The people don't have it easy. They are the most oppressed, yet the strongest people I have seen. Their will to survive is inspiring and the joy they manage to hang on to is almost unexplainable.
They say the dirt in Africa is red because of all the blood that has been shed. I believe it. And to think… Jesus walked upon this land. His blood was also shed over this land, for this people. But when will that be enough. When will the people say 'no" to violence and not take up arms?
I don't know what the answer is. I know it's not the white man or aid organisations. They are just a band aid, sometimes causing as much damage as good. It has to be the local people themselves that stop all this bloodshed.
One thing I have learnt is how evil man inherently is. How in a moment they can turn face and let evil have it's way for them to survive. Everyone is out for themselves.
I guess that's why God's commandment to love your neighbour as yourself is so wise. If only we listened. If only we understood what that really meant.
Life isn't about wealth, or about building a nest egg for ourselves. It's not about status or power. It's about Love. It's about relationships. Only then will we reap the true reward of life's joy.
I was lying in bed the other night after watching a particularly disturbing movie on the Rwandan genocide (Shooting Dogs), crying out to God why there was so much evil in the world and why it seems to have so much power.
But I felt God clearly speak to me about His love.
His presence is not always so easy to see, it comes to us in a gentle way, not a harsh way as evil does.
It's not in your face all the time, so it's easy to miss.
But it keeps this world together.
It's Love, pure and simple.
Without it this world would have destroyed itself a long time ago.
When people unite, come together and love one another it's the glue that holds everything together.
It was then I realised God's presence is so much stronger than the devils. Love is seen everywhere. In our relationships between friends. Within marriage. Love for your children, parents, and relatives. Love for neighbours.
Its display has many faces. Love is found in generosity, kind words, service, helps, taking interest in another, a listening ear, having fun with others, enjoying Gods creation, sharing knowledge, prayer, worship, touch. It's a much more powerful force than any evil could bring because it lives on after death. Love has no boundaries, it is infinite and eternal. God is love. Love is God.
I wonder, is life really about living, or is actually about dieing?
I mean everything we do in this life reflects into eternity right? The bible says not to store up for yourselves treasures on earth where moth and rust destroy but build for yourself treasures in Heaven where neither moth or rust can destroy. But what do we do? Truthfully it seems all mankind is interested in is storing up wealth. Well, the western world is anyway. The Southern Sudanese don't care for wealth, for they know too well, that tomorrow, they may die.
So, are we right thinking we can go around stopping wars, or famine, or the spread of disease? Is life really about putting a band-aid on the world's problems?
People around the world are crying out for Peace. But is that really a conceivable option in the midst of such evil? Do we really believe our God is stronger than all that?
I think Jesus, in all His wisdom had it right when He said "Love your neighbour as yourself". To me that is the only key I see that fits.
But, that doesn't necessary mean an end to war or disaster. I don't know if that's really what our aim should be. World Peace is probably an impossible feat, and whatever beauty queen thinks they can implement it, I'd like to know their strategy!
Inner peace though is not impossible, nor is it unattainable. If we were to look at inner peace being the answer to the world's problems, we might be onto something. I think one way, and probably the clearest way to this, is through love. Loving one another as Christ loves us. Thinking more highly of others than we do of ourselves. It's not an easy task either. It's almost harder than going to a war torn country and applying band-aids, even at the risk of your own life being taken.
Why is that? Why are we so interested in ourselves? Why is it so hard to love – unconditionally?
One thought… God is love, right? Love therefore, is God.
Well if we were to look at the bible we can see that there is a continual spiritual battle taking place. God and all His angles raging war against Satan and all his demons. And whether we like it or not we, as spiritual beings, are involved.
We are in the biggest war of all time!! It's the battle of Love vs Self!!
So those are a few of my thoughts. No doubt many of you will have your own about what I have said, but that is how I see it… for now.
Life is a journey : )
I will inform you all of my next moves shortly in another email. I think this has given us all enough to think about for today… just watch this space : )
Love to you all
Amy
